LaDonna’s Birth of Twins

LaDonna’s Birth of Twins

This is the birth story of my second surrogacy journey.  We transferred two embryos on October 14, 2008.  We were due July 2, 2009.  I carried twins to 36 weeks, 4 days and delivered them on June 8, 2009.

At 36 weeks, 2 days, IM (intended mother) arrived to stay until her babies are born. This was a Friday.  On Saturday, I noticed I could breathe a little easier and Baby B didn't seem to be up in my rib as much. We were pretty sure the babies had dropped! IM treated my girls and I to a pedicure. We all really enjoyed that (I had never had one before) and all our toes looked beautiful!

Saturday evening, IM and I went for a walk around the block. Contractions were picking up some. Mostly, I just had a horrible backache though. IM and I decided to go ahead and go to L&D (labor and delivery) just to be safe. She called IF (intended father) and he made the 3.5 hour drive up as well. The nurse checked me and, lo and behold, I was already dilated to a 4!  IF arrived before long and I was just so glad they were both there. Before I knew it, everyone else was there to join us too. After a few hours of no progress, I convinced my mom to take my kids back home (it was 2 am) and my dad, stepmom, and brother to head home. IF's mom, brother, and sister arrived a little later and ended up getting a hotel room. By morning, I was only dilated to a 6. We walked the hospital halls, trying to get the contractions to pick up...but no luck. Our OB wasn't on call that weekend and the on call dr. was not willing to attempt an unmedicated vaginal twin delivery. So our poor OB was waiting around at home on me to do something.

He finally gave us the choice to either go home, get some rest and some food, and wait to see what happens. Or I could try some Pitocin. Well since I was exhausted and starving, and because I'd like to try to go natural as possible, we opted to go home. I felt bad because IF's mom and family headed home (also a 3.5 hour drive) and I felt like I let everyone down. Once I got home, I ate and took quite a long nap. I even got in a shower! Then, the IPs and I walked around the block a couple more times. Things hadn't seemed to change much, so IM suggested I try pumping. (Nipple stimulation will bring on uterine contractions.) I tried pumping and the contractions were starting to hurt. (I was also getting colostrum!)

We all headed back to the hospital. My mother-in-law came and picked up my kids. The nurse came and checked and I was still only a 6. No change?!?! Ugh. Well since it was so late (after 9 pm), our OB suggested we all get a good night's rest and see what happened overnight. If nothing, we can try some Pitocin in the morning. The IPs were able to get their own room and my husband slept on the couch in my room. I had a rough night sleeping. The hospital beds just weren't comfy...especially for a twin pregnant belly. I woke up for good around 5:30 am and decided to brush my teeth and put on a little make up. (I was sure the make up would be gone and/or smeared by the time the day was over, but I figured I'd try to look my best at least to start out the big day...lol.)

From this point on, I'll write as much as I recall. It seems I've forgotten bits and pieces here and there and some things are coming back as others remind me of things that happened.

The nurse checked me again Monday morning and I was still at a 6. Our OB came in shortly after (I think about 8:15) and broke Baby A's bag of water. He also ordered a low dose of Pitocin. The nurse started it at a level of 4 and I could feel the contractions picking up. I was doing OK with them and kept wondering when they'd start hurting more. I was in pain, but it wasn't like I remembered from previous labors. I was determined to do this unmedicated and as natural as possible and it was beginning to become a reality! I'm not sure when, but sometime the level of Pitocin was upped to 6 and that seemed to get things really moving. IM had left the room to pump, as she was inducing lactation to breastfeed her babies.

Not long after she left, I was feeling lots more pressure. The nurse came and checked and I was an 8, so my IF frantically called IM to head back. The nurse didn't know when to take me to the OR. (The OB insisted on delivering in there "just in case".) I assured her it was time because I tend to go fast. Before I knew it, the urge to push was there. IM had made it back and I was just glad everyone was there so nobody would miss it. The nurse kept telling me to pant and all I wanted to do was push. I was being rolled down the hall and into the OR. I remember the nurse checking me again once we were in the OR and telling me I was completely dilated.

They helped me get onto the surgical table and that was the most uncomfortable place to deliver a baby (or two) ever! Our OB came in and told me I could finally push. Baby A was a very easy delivery. She came out and she was placed on my belly. I looked at her and she was crying and I was so relieved. I wanted to hand her over to her mommy, but there were too many things and people between us. I vaguely remember IF cutting her cord and the nurses took her from me to be cleaned up. I kept trying to see the IPs' expressions, but it was hard with all the activity. Plus my job still wasn't done...

So I figured the second baby would be a breeze to deliver. He should've just slid down and popped right out, right? Ha!

I remember asking the OB if the next one was in position and I remember him answering that he was checking. About that time, I felt the bag of water break and an immense amount of pain. The OB had reached up to internally turn Baby B (as he was transverse). I was screaming and the OB was yelling at me to gain some control. But yeah, there is no control for that. He had warned me before that he may have to do that, but he assured me it wouldn't hurt more than when he had to manually remove part of the placenta from my last delivery. (He lied. It hurt a LOT more!) He was having trouble getting Baby B to come head down. I had so many thoughts running through my head. I was screaming for him to stop, to just put me out, and to just take the baby. (I was ready for a c-section, if he needed to...it was THAT painful!) My husband was at the head of my bed and I had a hold of his t-shirt sleeves and was pulling as hard as I could. Although I was aware of my actions, I had no control over them. I heard the OB order the anesthesiologist to give me something and I just kept waiting to be put out or to pass out from the amount of pain I was in. But, before I knew it, there was another little baby laying on my belly. The OB had pulled him out feet first. Baby B wasn't crying and I was terrified. His eyes were open though and we just stared at each other. I think both of us were in shock and traumatized. I remember the OB telling the nurses to just take him, as he still wasn't crying. As soon as they were ready to give him some oxygen though, he let out a good healthy cry. I was so relieved....yet tired and ready to sleep.

"Baby A" was born 6/8/09 at 10:59 am, weighing 6 lbs, 2 oz and was 19.5"!
"Baby B" was born 6/8/09 at 11:04 am, weighing 6 lbs, 13 oz and was 20.5"!

I know IM came over to check on me after the deliveries, but I just wanted her to be with her babies. I felt so bad that they witnessed all that. While I know it was the best day of their lives and they were able to see their babies come into the world, I feel bad that it was so dramatic and scary for them. IM and I had always been in agreement from day 1 that this would be an attempted unmedicated birth...and it was. We did it, but it wasn't quite as "peaceful" as we had hoped.

Well after the babies were born, I delivered the placenta and was rolled back to my room. The IPs went with their babies to the nurseries.

The OB said he felt a pop when he was trying to get Baby B out and he suggested an orthopedist take a look at his arm. Unfortunately, the OB broke Baby B's right humerus while trying to turn him.  He was kept in NICU for awhile because of that and because his blood sugar was a bit low, but was released to be with his sister by that night.  (Baby B is just fine today, as is his sister!)

Once I got back to my room, the drama didn't stop. The nurse kept pushing on my belly, trying to control the bleeding. But, apparently, it wasn't stopping.  My husband was terrified at the amount of blood I was losing and how rapidly it was happening. I begged the nurse not to push anymore because the pain was too much. I just couldn't take anymore. I was done.

Suddenly, there were tons of people back in the room and the OB was being called back. He was sure it was probably a piece of retained placenta. He suggested a suction D&C. The anesthesiologist came back to talk to me about the procedure. I wasn't too fond of the idea after all I had just been through, so I tried to come up with alternatives (like waiting until the following day...lol). Obviously, that wasn't an option and I was wheeled back to the OR again...

I woke up over 2 hours later and felt the breathing tube being pulled from my mouth. I immediately asked for my husband and a nurse went to get him. I was told everything went well and everyone was fine. And for that, I was/am extremely grateful.

Honestly, I was "out of it" the rest of Monday and most of Tuesday. I remember having some visitors and I remember visiting with the IPs and the babies. The OB monitored my levels and decided against giving me some blood. He ordered iron for me and I could feel myself improving a little more each day. I was finally released from the hospital Wednesday (2 days after their birth), as were the babies.

Even knowing the way it all goes now, I would still do it all over again. This journey has not only brought two more beautiful babies into this world, but given me friendships that I probably would not have found otherwise.

Apparently it's true that we tend to "forget" some of the pain we go through during labor and delivery, as I am now 21 weeks pregnant with another surrogate baby.  This one (yes, it's just one) is due April 26, 2011!  :)

LaDonna’s Birth of Miss “A”

LaDonna’s birth of Miss “A”

Preface:  This was my first surrogacy journey.  We transferred 2 embryos on April 13, 2006.  We were first pregnant with twins, until we lost one at 9 weeks.  Fortunately, the other baby continued to grow and thrive.  I carried her 40 weeks exactly.  Her parents requested I be induced on her due date (if she had not come on her own prior) and I reluctantly agreed.

Miss "A" was born December 30, 2006 at 1:07 PM.  It was really kinda neat because 7 years ago to the day I was at the same hospital delivering *my* baby boy.  I'll never forget my first surro baby's birthdate...not that I would anyway...lol.
 

Anyway, she was 7 pounds, 4 ounces and 19" long.  She had a head full of hair and was/is absolutely beautiful!  Her mom and dad were SO proud and excited, yet a little nervous to have a newborn again. They've apparently done just fine though, since she's now almost 4.  :)

We arrived at the hospital at 7:30 am.  I ran into my OB while we were checking in, so I asked if he could try to just break my water first.  (I tend to go fast once my bag of water has ruptured, based on my previous labors.)  He reluctantly agreed.  They took me to my room and had me change.  The nurse came in to check me.  I was dilated to 3, still 50% effaced, and baby was at a -1 station.  She then broke my water around 8:45.  There was some light meconium, but nothing to be too worried about.  The nurse read over my birth plan and was absolutely wonderful about trying to help me achieve another natural labor and delivery.  

She had me get up and walk the halls for 30 minutes to see if contractions would pick up.  I had a few contractions that were in my back and radiated down my bottom and into the back of my thighs.  Of course, I figured that meant the baby was face up and the nurse agreed.  She brought in a birthing ball to help me try to reposition the baby, but it didn't work.

Around 10 am, the contractions just were not picking up, so here came the evil Pitocin.  They started it and nothing happened, so at 10:45, they turned it up.  Around 11, I had the first painful contraction.  However, they still weren't pleased with the contraction pattern, so they turned the Pit up again around 11:30.  Contractions were coming pretty quickly and were getting quite painful at this point.  My back was killing me.  The nurse came in around 12:20 and asked if she could check me.  I agreed because I wanted to know where we were at.  First she said I was dilated to a 5, 100% effaced.  Then she said, "No...more of a 6, maybe even a 7."  At any rate, it was going quickly and my contractions had suddenly gotten worse just while she was checking.  She ran down the hall to get my husband.  (He left the room with IF (intended father) to eat lunch.  They didn't want to eat in front of me.)  Then she called my OB to get back up to the hospital.  The nurse was back in the room by 12:35, bringing in the supplies and tearing down the bed.  Our OB walked in behind her.  

He checked me and said I just had a little "lip" left until I was complete.  He was suiting up as I had another contraction.  He told me to push if I felt the need...so I did.  He sat down and verified she was indeed "sunny side up", so he turned her for me.  It didn't help.  At that point, I felt the most intense labor pains I think I had ever felt.  Between her being face up and the Pitocin, I'm not sure how I managed to deliver unmedicated again.  I pushed through a few contractions and then lost control.  I wanted to give up, but our OB was wonderful.  He got my attention and made me look at him.  He told me to get a grip and to use all my energy to push.  I tried to focus on him, but what got my attention was when I saw IM (intended Mother) standing behind him with happy tears in her eyes.  I knew she must be able to see her baby girl coming.  I pulled myself together and was able to push the baby's head out.  The OB had to clean her nose and mouth out very well because of the meconium (but she was fine).  I pushed again and out came her shoulders and the rest of her.  He laid her on my tummy and the first thing I said was, "You hurt!  But wow...you look like your brother!"  The baby cried just for a minute or so and then she was quiet.  She had her eyes wide open and was so alert.  They cleaned her off and took her to the warmer.  

I still had to deliver the placenta, but it was stuck.  The dr was pulling on the cord trying to get it out.  He was telling me to push, but the urge was gone and I was just exhausted.  He kept pushing on my belly trying to get it out.  Nothing.  Finally he said he was going to have to remove it manually.  Before I could even question him, he reached up there and retrieved it.  I never screamed during the whole ordeal...until then.  That was the worst part yet!  But it was done, my job was over, and Miss "A" was finally here!  The nurse brought her back to me.  I kissed her on the cheek and handed her over to her mommy.  IM asked if I wanted to hold her for a bit first.  But since she hadn't even held her daughter yet, I felt IM should take her and bond.  I said, "She's your's!" as I lifted her to her mommy.  The feeling I had watching IM hold her daughter for the first time, as IF looked on, was just the most wonderful feeling.  I helped make that happen!

It was another speedy and natural delivery (besides the Pitocin) and that was very important to me.  But, most importantly, the IPs (intended parents) have their baby girl and their family is complete!

(I have since delivered girl/boy twins on 6/8/09 as a surrogate and am currently pregnant with another surro baby girl, due 4/26/11!)

tags surrogacy, intended parents, intended mother, intended father, induction, medical intervention, no pain medication, birth stories on demand, surrogacy birth story, childbirth story, Labor and delivery story, LaDonna's birthing Story

Michele's Surrogacy Birth of a Baby Girl

Michele’s surrogacy birth of a baby girl

Preface:  We transferred one single embryo on Feb 2nd, 2009. My due date was Oct 21st, 2009. I went 42 weeks.

IM=Intended Mother

IF= Intended Father

IP’s= Intended Parents

Sunday Nov 1st, the midwife gave me permission to try some castor oil and blue/black cohosh to try and get things started, so that we won’t have to induce tomorrow.I took my first 2 oz of castor oil at 11:00 am, and the second 2oz at 12:00. I started the blue/black tinctures at 12:30, 1 dropper of each every 15 minutes, for 2 hours (8 times) then dropping back to 1 dropper of each every hour.The castor oil is working, and the cohoshes are starting to kick in, as I am having contractions every 6 minutes, but they are only 45 seconds long. Midwife wants them to be 5 minutes apart, at least 60 seconds long and wants me to do that consistently for 2 hours before she checks me. At Friday’s appt, I was dilated but still very thick and very high and posterior.By midnight, all contractions have stopped and I have resigned myself to being induced tomorrow.

Mon Nov 2nd Midwife calls at 8 to make plans for the day. We are both disappointed that castor oil and blue/black didn’t work. (My son was worried that the castor oil might hurt me and the baby. He was hearing CASTROL, as in castrol GTX, the auto motor oil, and couldn’t figure out why my midwife told me to take motor oil). Since my midwife doesn’t have cytotec in her protocol, we have to go to another birthing center to have it administered, so we make plans to meet at our birthing center at 9 for a quick check up. My midwife checks me and I am dilated and still thick (story of my life) and still pretty posterior, so we head over to the other center. My IP’s (Intended Parents) are meeting us there at 10.

The other midwife checks me, the baby and explains to me the risks of cytotec. She tells me what to look for, what I need to do if certain things occur and gives my midwife terbutaline in case I hyper-stimulate. She then gives me the cytotec to take by mouth. It should start working within an hour, but within 15 minutes, I start to feel crampy. The midwives discuss it and determine that because I am so thick still I may need a second dose in 4 hours, and we make plans to come back at 2:30. My midwife, my husband and I go to lunch and my IP’s (Intended Parents) head back home to wait and see what we need to do.

My husband and I arrive back home around 12:30 and by then I am having some time-able contractions, about 4 minutes apart. They aren’t very strong, or long, but they begin to increase. He makes plans to drop me off at my birthing center at 1:45, then go run some errands, pick up my son and daughter and will meet us back at our birthing center at 4:00, about the time the midwife and I will get back from the other birthing center and doing the 2nd dose of cytotec. When we arrive at our birthing center at 1:45, I am in tears and the contractions are 2 minutes apart and 45 seconds long. My midwife calls the other midwife to let her know we won’t be there at 2:30 for the 2nd dose, and that she will keep her informed. I call my IP’s (Intended Parents) to let them know the midwife is going to monitor me for awhile and that we aren’t going for the 2nd dose unless the contractions stop or get really far apart. At this point, the midwife is estimating 8-10 hours of labor, so my husband goes to run his errands and IP’s (Intended Parents) wait for us to call and let them know things are actually real before they make the 1 hour trip to the birthing center.

At 4:00 my oldest daughter and her boyfriend come to keep me company, and the contractions are still 2 minutes apart but are about a minute long. They are starting to get uncomfortable, but I am still able to talk and joke with my daughter and the midwives. My husband, daughter and son arrive about 4:30 and by now I am very uncomfortable and starting to say I want to go home and not have a baby today. The midwife offers to check me to see how far I am and if I am at least 5, I can utilize the tub. I agree and she checks me to find I am a 6, stretchy 7, so off to the tub I go about 5:00. She says I am still pretty thick though and that I am not effacing evenly, that I have more cervix on one side, so she wants me to lie on my left side in the tub. My husband calls my IP’s (intended parents)to tell them that we won’t be going back for the 2nd dose and that they need to come, because I am progressing pretty good. My kids come in and talk to me, and at one point my son even asked me if I wanted my computer to harvest my Farmville crops. He was worried because he has never seen anyone in pain like that, and didn’t know what to think, but my daughter, husband and the midwives all assured him that I was fine, and not to worry.

After about 45 minutes in the tub, I am not liking the contractions at all and have changed my mind completely about birthing, delivering and am asking for drugs. The midwife that was in there with us calls the other midwife and has her help get me out because they are afraid I am further than they thought. They fish me out and check me and I am completely effaced and dilated to a 9 with a small lip. I begin to worry that my IP’s (Intended Parent’s) aren’t going to make it and my husband and the midwife call them to see where they are. They are stuck in traffic and are now starting to freak out about the possibility of not making it. One of the midwives is checking the baby heart rate with every contraction, and I begin feeling lots of pressure.

My husband is beside me, 2 of the midwives (I have 3) are standing at the foot of the bed and one is sitting on the foot of the bed monitoring the heart rate when I hear them say “that’s not good, we need to get her out now”. Her heart rate dropped with the last 2 contractions. They get me into position to start pushing, and of course my IP’s (intended parents) still aren’t there. My husband gets my daughter to come take pictures, just in case my IP’s don’t make it (she is 16) and she comes in with the camera. My midwife breaks my water bag and they check to make sure everything is okay and then tell me to take a deep breath and push with my next contraction. I hear the door chime ring and as I begin pushing, my IP’s walk in.

My IM (intended mother) comes to me at the side of the bed, apologizing for not getting there sooner. She is crying and not sure where to go or what to do. She wanted to be there for support during the labor, but I am actually glad she didn’t have to see me that way. The midwife tells her to come to the end of the bed and watch her baby be born. IF (intended father) has walked into the middle of me in the bed completely nude, legs spread, and a baby crowning, so he walks around the corner to give me privacy. He keeps asking my daughter what is going on, and she gives him small updates- she tells him “your daughter will be born soon, she’s crowning.” Within 3 pushes, she was out. She had her hand up by her face when she was coming out, so when the head delivered, I also delivered a hand, making it a little harder to get her shoulders out.

They clamped her cord (so they could collect cord blood) and called IF(intended father) over to cut the cord, then handed her to mommy for some skin to skin contact. As they were collecting the cord blood, I am looking around to make sure everyone is okay when I hear one of the midwives yell “I need pit”. They jabbed me in the leg with a needle and begin putting pressure on my abdomen because I was hemorrhaging. They rushed everyone but my husband out of the room, started an IV on me and began working on getting the bleeding stopped. I lost quite a bit of blood, but didn’t need to be transported or get a transfusion (thank God) . I am still feeling a little weak and dizzy when I stand, but my husband is home, taking great care of me.

Mom, dad and baby are great. She was the smallest of all the babies I have birthed. 7.10. My own were 7.12, 8.13 and 8.2. I am surprised she was as little as she was being 2 weeks late, but just glad that she is healthy. Mom and baby took an herbal bath for more bonding time, and IP’s (Intended parents) came in with their little girl with tears streaming down their faces, telling me how they can’t thank me enough.

Because of the bleeding, I wasn’t able to hold her for awhile, but eventually I got to, and it was a magical moment. I told my husband, that surprisingly, I will miss her, but I didn’t feel that emotional bond to her like with my own kids. I didn’t check to make sure she had 10 fingers and 10 toes, and it wasn’t hard to hand her back, because I knew all along she wasn’t mine to keep. We got lots of great pictures of everyone, even of us all together with the midwives. This was their first surrogacy birth, so they wanted to document their part in it.

My husband later told me that he wanted to ask my IF (Intended Father) to come and join us on the bed, but he wasn't sure how I would have felt about it. Looking back, I wish he had asked him. I am not a modest person and I appreciate him for his efforts, but honestly, my focus was more on making them parents and not on who could see my girl parts.

I did end up going to the emergency room 10 days after her birth because I started bleeding profusely. I ended up with a D&C and a blood transfusion, but I don’t regret for a second my choices. I am considering carrying again for another couple and am in the “getting to know you” stages with them. 

Tags: Black and Blue Cohosh, Castor oil, D&C, Terbutaline, cytotec, embryo, farmville, intended parents, midwife, overdue, surrogacy, surrogate